Showing posts with label depression. Show all posts
Showing posts with label depression. Show all posts

Friday, August 12, 2016

Finding Our Identity: What We Do Is Not Who We Are

After a year of being pretty much unemployed, save for only working one day a week, I have started a new job. It’s nothing too fancy, and it’s not at all what I thought I would be doing with my degree. I help manage an online store of a very successful e-commerce business that is growing very fast. I sit at a desk from 8AM till 4PM with only 30 minutes allotted for break time a day. It is very laid back and yet still very professional. The people are nice and the way the business is run is very impressive.

After only a week working there, I found myself thinking, “how in the world am I to do anything meaningful for the Lord while sitting at a desk for 8 hours a day, only really having contact with the three or four people in the cubicles around me?” After a year of praying for God to use me for His glory and ministry, I’m stuck here in a cubicle.

Don’t get me wrong, I love my cubicle and desk.

I thought for sure the Lord would lead me to a ministry job of some sorts that helped to make a difference in the lives of others. During the majority of my college career I was on the frontlines of war. A culture war, a spiritual war, a war determined the life or death of millions of Americans. While attending Summit Ministries, the Lord spoke to me telling me that He wanted me to go to war. After seeking the advice and counsel of several mentors, I answered God’s call. At the time, I did not know that I was going to war, but it wouldn’t take long for me to find out. This war was against death itself. The Lord called me to be a voice for the voiceless, to stand up for those who could not stand up for themselves. He called me to sand up against Abortion. Since 1973, abortion has taken the lives of over 60 million innocent human beings in America. That is ten times as many than were killed in Hitler’s Holocaust. My first step in this battle was to restart my college’s Pro-Life group. I had been involved with it briefly my freshman year but didn’t really know much about the subject. At Summit God provided me with the resources I needed to learn in order to lead this group. With the help of the Lord, and my good friend Robby, we rebuilt the group from the ground up and we accomplished a lot. We focused of educating people about abortion and helping pregnant and parenting students on campus. We had baby showers, information booths, fund raisers for our local pregnancy care center that we helped to open. The Lord was using us to accomplish great things.


I was also given the opportunity to do a 3-month internship in the nation’s capitol working with several major pro-life organizations as well as in the office of a pro-life congressman. I was in the heat of the cultural, intellectual, and spiritual battle for the equal right to life of all human beings. I saw the evil one in the faces and slogans of the angry and militant protestors who wanted the right to kill their children. I saw the affects of the evil one in the faces and tears of women and men who had been badly hurt by abortion. I met post-abortive men and women whose regret caused them to become pro-life activists. I met former abortionists and abortion clinic workers who are now standing up for the right to life. I met people who were born due to their mother’s being raped, that were told by society that because of the circumstances of their their conception, that they did not have the right to live. I even met a survivor of a failed abortion who now travels the country telling her story. I heard story after story of the terrible affects that abortion had on society. I was surrounded by death and pain. I knew that the Lord was using me to help people, and I knew that it was nothing that I could have ever done myself, it was only through His leading that I was able to help these people. I was found that I was most comfortable at war. The fields were rip for the Lord’s healing. That’s where He led me, and that’s what I was to do. I even wrote a small book that focused on getting churches and ministers educated and more involved with helping to end abortion and helping those that suffer because of it.



Students For Life Interns on the steps of the Supreme Court in July of 2014

After I graduated from college I spent a year of unemployment. During that time, I helped lead multiple Bible studies, helped to mentor and encourage many people, and share the gospel with many people. Although jobless, I was being used by the Lord to minister to people. Towards the end of my unemployment and into the beginning of my new job, the evil one placed thoughts into my mind telling me that I was useless. As I observed my situation, I realized something that I had never realized before. Many times in movies and in real life, characters and individuals that have spent time in war have a hard time adjusting back to normal life. The conflict and excitement became normal for them, they were serving a great purpose and helping to protect innocent people. When they returned to normal life, it was too dull, they felt useless, they had still had the mentality of a soldier but were not on the frontlines any more. I used to think that was a silly concept, but I finally understood it. The feeling of knowing you are being used for something great and protecting innocent people from the evil one is a rewarding feeling and, despite the horrors they face, everyday they wake up ready to serve. I now understood that. I was back home from a war that was continuing to wage on. I realized that even though I was no longer on the frontlines like I was so accustomed to, I can still contribute to the fight. I can continue to educate people about the issue of abortion, I can still volunteer at my local pregnancy care center, I can still write about it and discuss it with people. That isn’t as glorious and showy as being on the frontlines, but it is equally as important. Simply a different front to fight on.

I know, you’re probably wondering, “how does this relate to his new job that he talked about in the beginning?”. I’m glad you asked. As I previously stated, I recently started thinking, “how in the world am I to do anything meaningful for the Lord while sitting at a desk for 8 hours a day, only really having contact with the three or four people in the cubicles around me?”. I thought that I would have a job in the pro-life movement or in some type of Christian non-profit that made a difference in people’s lives. I wasn’t in it for the money, I was in it to help people. As long as I had enough to make ends meet, I was content. But alas, here I am sitting on my butt 8 hours a day. Several people I know, and a Bible verse helped me to come to terms with this quandary. Upon bringing this up to my friend and mentor, Daniel Brown, he made me realize that you don’t have to work in a ministry to have a ministry. He said something along the lines of, “Do your ministry after work, invest in people and meet with people after your work day, that’s what I do.”  That made sense. Although I can still minister to people at my work, if the opportunity presents itself, my after work hours are where I can do my ministry to others. A week later I was talking to a very inspiring pro-life advocate by the name of Jason Jones. You can read his story of how the death of his daughter through abortion changed the course of his life here.

I was asking Jason for advice on a political matter and he sent me a link to a video that he filmed a few weeks earlier. While the answer he gave answered the question I asked, it went deeper and helped me with this personal issue of ministry that I have been trying to come to terms with. In the video he sent me he was addressing conservative people who are worried about the election and don’t feel comfortable voting for Donald Trump. He pointed out that if we think that the only thing that matters in politics and saving our country is the presidential election, then we know nothing about politics. He said that if we really care about our country and our future, we should be involved in the free institutions of civil society such as our churches, our families, our neighborhoods, our communities. Jason said, “You know, we all only have so much time and so much energy. There are a lot of races and cycles, the presidential election is just one.” Not only did this answer the initial question I asked him, it made me think about my job and ministry. We all only have so much time and energy, and yes, there are a lot of opportunities for for ministry, but our place of work is only one opportunity. So what if you don’t work in a ministry position, there are tons of other places that you can minister in. That’s what I took away from what he said. God was able to use Jason’s advice on one subject to help me in another area of my life.

The last and final thing that helped me figure this thing out came to me while preparing to lead my Monday night bible study. I was reading through 1 Corinthians 9. In this letter the apostle Paul is defending his right as an apostle to get financial support from churches. Although he refuses to take anything from the church in Corinth, he tells them that he is entitled to it nonetheless.

“Am I not free? Am I not an apostle? Have I not seen Jesus our Lord? Are you not the result of my work in the Lord? Even though I may not be an apostle to others, surely I am to you! For you are the seal of my apostleship in the Lord. This is my defense to those who sit in judgment on me.  Don’t we have the right to food and drink? Don’t we have the right to take a believing wife along with us, as do the other apostles and the Lord’s brothers and Cephas? Or is it only I and Barnabas who lack the right to not work for a living?” 
-1 Cor. 9:1-6

As much ministry as Paul and his ever- encouraging companion, Barnabas, did, they still had a day job that they worked at to receive money to live on. I’m not sure what Barnabas did, but we know that from Acts 18:3 that Paul was a tentmaker. Several times throughout his letters Paul references working (1 Cor. 4:12, 1 Thess. 2:9, and 1 Thess. 4:11). So, even the greatest missionary that ever lived, a man who dedicated his entire life to the point of death for Christ, even he had a day job that he did in addition to his amazing ministry. His day job was not what defined him, a tentmaker is not what he was most well known for. It was a minor part of his life.

All this to say, I realized that I was looking for a job in a ministry so that I could identify as this ministry or that ministry. In our society we place so much on our occupation. When you meet someone new, one of the first questions you ask them is “where do you work?” or “what do you do for a living?”. We identify people as “Andy the mechanic”, “John the college professor” or “Steven the doctor”. As a society we are to blame for identifying people as their occupations. That’s they way everyone sees it: you are what you do. Its such a huge deal. But as Christians, should we make such a big deal over where we work? Should our identities be reduced to our occupation? A friend and mentor of mine often says, “I’m not a doctor who happens to be a Christian, I’m a Christian who happens to be a doctor.”. Doctoring is what he does, but it isn’t who he is. He is a Christian. As Christians we find our identity in Christ. We are children of God (John 1:12), branches of the true vine (John 15:1-5), friends of Jesus (John 15:15), justified and redeemed (Romans 3:24), crucified with Christ (Rom. 6:6), free of condemnation (Rom. 8:1), co-heirs with Christ (Rom. 8:17), saints (1 Cor. 1:2), temples of the Holy Spirit (1 Cor. 6:19), and the righteousness of God (2 Cor. 5:21). We are so much more than simply our occupation. What we do does not define or identify us.

So, let’s be like Paul, he didn’t identify as a tentmaker, he identified as many different things, all within the framework of his identity in Christ.

It’s not to say that you can’t have a ministry at work. That is totally fine. Colossians 3:23 says, “Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters,”. Ephesians 6:7 says, “Serve wholeheartedly, as if you were serving the Lord, not people,”.  We can also be a light in a dark world at work just by having a good attitude and being kind to all people. Let everyone see something different in you. Let Christ shine through you. As my momma always says, “You might be the only Jesus that some people see.”. There are so manylittle things we can do at work that bring glory to God.

In closing, I want to share with you some wise words by Keith Krell, his identity is a Christian, but his occupation is senior pastor of Fourth Memorial Church in Spokane, WA and associate professor of biblical exposition at Moody Bible Institute–Spokane. He says,

"In 1 Thess. 2:9 Paul writes, “For you recall, brethren, our labor and hardship, how working night and day so as not to be a burden to any of you, we proclaimed to you the gospel of God.” If you read 1 Corinthians 9, Paul makes it clear in that passage that he doesn’t consider it wrong for a man to live off the preaching of the gospel. And in 1 Timothy 5 he says that an elder who both rules and teaches is worthy of “double honor,” which presumes that elders would in fact be paid for their work. But he himself apparently worked in secular jobs wherever he went so that he would be free of any accusations about his motives. His work ethic was exemplary. Tragically, many Christians give Christianity a black-eye because of their poor work performance. This is a crying shame, since work is an expression of worship and it also serves as a powerful witness. This week, will you go to your cubicle or your classroom or home and work as unto the Lord? As you work your daily grind for the glory of God the mundane and monotonous nature of your work can become extraordinary in its kingdom impact. A little example can have a big influence.”



Tuesday, February 11, 2014

YOU ARE NOT ALONE


For those of you who have followed my blog for a while, you know that my life has been riddled with trials and valleys of darkness. Ive suffered through 2 very traumatic experiences, they were the darkest times of my life. The first one I rarely talk about because my mind has blocked out a lot of it, but the second one I have been quite open about both on here and in person. There is something that I learned from those experiences that changed the way I went through them. And if I did not know this thing, I would not be here now. The thing that I knew and that kept me going even when I wanted t end it all, was four simple words: 



I knew, because of my faith in Jesus Christ, that I was never alone. I knew that even in my deepest and darkest of hours of pain and depression, that God was there with me. In both those dark experiences, I felt hopeless and lost and abandoned by those that I loved most. Except for the fact that I knew that God was with me. Yes, most of us all hear growing up that "God is with us" an that "Jesus loves you" and that "He will comfort you". I had heard all of that and I believed it, but I had never experienced it first hand. Until these two experiences. Those were times where I saw no way out, nothing but pain on all sides. I was in a deep dark hole all alone. But it wasn't until I looked up and saw the light, that I realized that all those sayings about God that I heard growing up were 100% true. And in those times, they became very real for me.

We always hear about "submitting to the Lord" or "humbling ourselves before the Lord", and those are actions in the life of a Christian that are often very hard to do, especially in this day and age. We find ourselves so preoccupied with school, jobs, family, friends, money, relationships, ect... that we forget to focus. And many times it takes us losing all of those things to realize that we need to set our sights on what can truly bring us life. For me, and for many of you, it has taken just that. We lose all and have nowhere to turn but to God, and in that time, we fall at the foot of the cross and bring all our troubles and worries to the one who loves us unconditionally. 

Jesus tells us in Matthew 11:28-30 - "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."

Now, I didn't completely understand this verse until last summer. I was working as a counselor at a Christian camp and my good friend Daniel was preaching and explained what the word "yoke" meant. My whole life I read this verse and others with the word in it and assumed that it meant egg yoke (yes, I am an idiot). But I learned that a yoke was a wooden crosspiece that is fastened over the necks of two animals and attached to the plow or cart that they are to pull. So essentially what Jesus is saying is that the load that we carry is full and heavy and troublesome, but he is offering to take that from us and give us His yoke, which is light and easy too carry. 

There are two reasons that I have found that we are not alone. 

Reason 1


No matter what you are going through, no matter what emotions you feel, you are never alone, God is always with you! 

"Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for The Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave or forsake you." -Deuteronomy 31:6

"Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me." -Psalm 23:4

"The Lord is near to the broken hearted and saves the crushed in spirit" -Psalm 34:18

"God has said, 'Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.'" -Hebrews 13:5

Reason 2



No matter what you are going through, no matter what emotions you feel, no matter who has wronged you or deserted you, even if you feel like your world is empty and you are worthless you are never alone, more than likely there is someone who cares for you. Someone whose world would crash if it weren't for you, someone that you make feel like they are not worthless. More than likely you have no idea of this person or how they feel. To them, you might mean the world to them. You might give them strength and hope. 
This could either be a romantic sense or just friendship. But no matter how alone you feel, the odds are that someone needs you and cares for you and wants to be there for you.

"The godly give good advice to their friends; the wicked lead them astray" -Proverbs 12:26

"A friend is always loyal, and a brother is born to help in time of need" -Proverbs 17:17

"A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother." -Proverbs 18:24

"The heartfelt counsel of a friend is as sweet as perfume and incense" -Proverbs 27:9

"As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another" -Proverbs 27:17

"Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up the fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up" -Ecclesiastes 4:9-10

"Is any pleasure on earth as great as a circle of Christian friends by a good fire?" -C.S. Lewis

So, if you are reading this and you feel alone, unloved, abandoned, or hopeless, remember these 2 reasons why 
YOU ARE NOT ALONE